“I need some advice to help save my marriage.” Is this something you’ve been saying recently? Have you and your spouse hit a crossroads and you wonder whether your relationship can survive? If this is indeed the case, there is help for you. Although it may feel as though your marriage is beyond repair, it’s likely not. There are several things you can do, beginning today, to ensure your relationship with your spouse improves and your family stays together.Communication is obviously essential if you hope to have a mutually satisfying, fulfilling marriage. Most couples share everything about what they’re feeling early in the relationship. They’re open and honest and don’t think twice about telling each other when something is bothering them. Once children, career pressures and the day-to-day stresses of juggling bills enter the equation, some people start to hold in what they’re feeling so they don’t burden their partner. You need to share what you’re feeling with your partner and also encourage them to do the same. Ensure you approach the subject of an open and honest conversation in a non-threatening way. You have to reassure your spouse that you won’t verbally attack them when they are revealing what they feel. If you can be supportive with them, they’ll always feel safe and comfortable talking about the relationship with you.Be more positive when you’re with your partner and let that seep into how you treat them. When a relationship is beginning to come apart it’s easy to focus just on the negative aspects of your partner. Make a point to only think about the things about your spouse you love. Tell them each and every day how thankful you are for what they bring to your life. As simple as this seems, it can greatly impact a relationship. When a person feels their partner is being more positive and caring, they’ll reflect that in their own behaviour and will also be more affirmative.
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Are you locked in a marriage that seems to be beyond hope? Would you like to know how to save a marriage in that condition and avoid breaking up your family?Running away from a problem marriage can create more problems than it solves. Wouldn’t you rather save your marriage and enjoy living with your spouse again? The good news is that you probably can so let’s get started.There are a lot of reasons for a marriage to have problems. People change with time and circumstances and a married couple can drift apart. Work issues, changing societal pressures, finances and even children can contribute to marital strife.Many couples seek counseling with secular marriage counselors or family therapists, and some do save their marriage and improve their lives this way. But this route can also be very expensive and if finances are one of the problem areas in the marriage this will just hurt all the more.In times like these when money is short, hiring a psychologist or family counselor is not how to save a marriage. The outrageous fees will just make matters worse.You may want to seek help and advice for saving your marriage from a pastor or counselor provided by a religious service. If you have a church home, that is the obvious place to start. Most pastors are trained in marriage counseling and keeping families together.A Catholic priest may also be trained but you might wonder what a guy who has never married and never will knows about how to save a marriage. Even still, you may want to see if he can help.Contacting a pastor for marriage counseling can also lead you to a conference or a workshop where they will address the most common marital issues in detail. There may well be a cost to attending, but there may not be one in your area soon, and that can be a problem.A conference can also be a way to “anonymous” help. Many of these programs are advertised as being there to strengthen a marriage and attendance is not an admission of a marriage in crisis.Some of the workshops have ways of submitting questions without identifying yourself also. If anonymity is an feature you seek in advice for how to save a marriage, then naturally the web is a good source also.What if you do not have a church pastor you can go to or just do not want to? Maybe your marital problems are not public knowledge in your church and you would like to keep it that way.One thing for sure is that the longer you wait before you seek help the harder it will be to overcome your problems and the greater the chance that the marriage will end in the meantime.
Let me get quickly to the point: I am a woman who was able to stop her divorce and save her marriage. Looking back, I see the loads of mistakes I did along the way. To tell you of my experiences in stopping my divorce I have created a website, but first I want to give you some tips on what you should and should not to in order to stop your divorce.First of all, you do not beg to your spouse. This is an “order” if you really want to stop your divorce – if you have been begging to your wife or husband to save your marriage then stop it immediately. To keep your marriage, you have to be more attractive to your spouse. And if you beg, that means he or she can have you whenever he or she wanted anyway – which makes you very accessible, and is against the general “be inaccessible” principle which works wonders when one wants to get his or her ex back, save his or her marriage and so on. This is rule 1.The second rule is a continuation of the first rule – Extend your “inaccessibility”. Be absent from home so that your spouse won’t be able to see you all the time. Don’t go away for a week of course, but just leave at mornings and come at night, for example, at Sundays when both of you are expected to be home. This will remind your husband or wife that you are becoming more inaccessible to him or her by the moment – and this will hugely raise your attractiveness which in turn will help you to stop your divorce and save your marriage.
You may have tried everything to save your marriage from falling apart. Sometimes you ask why things are what they are after all the effort to save your marriage. At this point, no one wants to take the blame. When things are not going well in a relationship, you both want to blame each other but the best thing to do is to look for a solution.Issues like lack of affection, poor communication, infidelity, boredom and many more affect marriages today. Only one thing should be done in this case. Swallow your pride and ask for help.Here are simple ways you can use to save your marriage;1. Do things together:The moment you stop having projects together as a couple, the marriage is in trouble. Go on holiday or do simple things like preparing dinner together. I know it’s not easy but it can be done once in a while. I’m talking about working things out here. Remember that you get what you give.2. Look back and find out what you used to enjoy doing.Boredom is the quickest killer of marriage. Maybe you’ve become too serious with life that you don’t play any more. Are you too busy with kids that you don’t have time to spend together? It may be your career. Leave those kids with your helper and spend time with each other.Now, look back and check whether you still make love the way you used to. If you have lost interest in this area, I suggest you work on it together with your partner. Show some affection. If you don’t do it in marriage, you’ll get it somewhere else and soon you’ll be dealing with infidelity. It’s time to save your marriage.3. Talk about anything:Find time to talk about issues that affect your marriage no matter how insignificant they may be. Don’t write a book about each other’s faults. Instead sit on the table and face them. Take your partner as a friend to whom you can express your feelings freely.Let me give a tip to my fellow women in marriage. Any strange thing you suspect about your man, don’t confront him the first day. It may be that he comes home late or he hides himself to answer the phone. The best thing to do in that case is to hold your breath. He will wander why you don’t bother to ask him. Now allow him to explain. This puts you in a very strong position.Read more relationship tips on my blog and save your marriage.
If you have ever been through a divorce you know that regardless of which side you were on that it can be a gut wrenching experience. The emotions, fears, uncertainties and just the time spent contemplating a new future can be daunting.Many years ago I asked a friend about marriage. His advice was simple. “The only thing that you know for certain before getting married is that you are willing to give it a try”. Sound advice? I’m not certain, he had just been divorced for the forth time.What if before launching into marriage and particularly before getting remarried a different approach was taken? What if as a couple they would approach the marriage with an intimate understanding of each other, not just passion and excitement? Perhaps this would be a better beginning for a couple intending to spend life together.As in my friends case, most likely he would continue either marrying the same type of person or he continued to make the same mistakes personally in each marriage. Without an honest assessment of the strengths, weaknesses, needs and desires of each partner then how could two people possibly last together in a marriage.Of course the best relationships grow stronger over time. Why not begin by growing stronger together right from the start. Fortunately for a couple just starting out professional counseling probably isn’t necessary. If you have a trusted and impartial friend, pastor or spiritual advisor that has a history of positive relationships and an ability to remain unbiased by all means seek them out and have conversations with them prior to marriage.
First of all I must say that I have been through your situation. I thought my marriage was ending (and surely it was) and was desperate to do anything to save my marriage. And in the end I did just that – I stopped my divorce, and my marriage is great now. So I’d like to guide you through this.One of the most destructive things I was (and I think you are too) tending towards is overreaction and panicking because of the possibility of divorce.You have to understand (I learnt this the hard way) that panicking, and being overwhelmed by your emotions will make you unable to consider carefully what you should do for saving your marriage. A second thing to note is that you must be in a state of mind to listen to your spouse and understand what his problems are. If you let your feelings just overwhelm you, you are not open for such things and can’t save your marriage.You must definitely calm down. This is the state of mind I like to call “marriage-saving state of mind”. You have to give yourself a couple of days to really process your feelings and how you feel about this situation. There is an old saying that goes that “you should sleep on a problem before you do anything about it” and it couldn’t be told better. A divorce would change your life – so you have a lot to think about for saving your marriage.It is completely normal to feel devastated because of an ending marriage. I know that those feelings can be overwhelming – I know this from personal experience. However, it is most crucial to find the right outlet for your feelings. At this moment, your partner is not the right outlet to release your feelings. As I said, I learned these the hard way.
There was a time in American history when it was against the law for a black male and white female to join hands in marriage. The restrictive laws and statutes prohibiting such marriages were struck down by the United States Supreme Court. The court’s action opened the floodgates for blacks and white in love to be happily married to each other. As a result, we now find many happily married couples of various races in America. The actions of interracial marriages are more prevalent in some states than others. Additionally, such marriages were more acceptable in various countries even before the laws were stricken in America.While serving with the United States Army in West Germany, I had the opportunity to work with the grandson of famed Olympic athlete “Jessie Owens.” The world knew Jessie Owens as the African-American athlete who made Hitler swallowed his words when he won numerous gold medals in the Olympics. He showed the strength, stamina, speed, and agility of African-American athletes whom Hitler considered as non-human and inferior. Jessie Owens grandson was the first sergeant for the unit to which I was assigned.First Sergeant Owens was married to a German female who spoke English more fluently than non-Germans speaking German. He also spoke and understood the German language in an excellent manner. He and his wife were happily married and resided in the German community. They were very supportive of each other and had several wonderful children who spoke German and English. First Sergeant Owens and I had coffee as often as possible and I would listen to the fascinating stories about his grandfather. The German people dearly loved and respected him.He had a small business with a line of sporting goods, sweat suits, and jogging suits; naturally, based on his grandfather’s fame and reputation. Why not? The ground work was already established; however, his family assisted him on the weekends at the military exchange at various bases where he marketed his sporting goods and wares to Germans and Americans. During scheduled tours with others, we would take a group trip into France for coffee and cake, and visited the crystal factories for souvenir shopping.According to some, First Sergeant Owens and his wife had a crossing experience. Additionally, to others it was an interracial marriage. Regardless of the classifications, he and his wife were enjoying life with their family members, friends, and children. The relationships they had on both sides of the world showed love and respect.Notwithstanding First Sergeant Owens and his wife, there were other African-American, Hispanic-American, and Native-American military service members married to German, French, and Italian females and resided in Europe. They were happily married and enjoying life in Germany, France, Italy and other European countries. Regardless of what classification their relationships were called by others, they were husbands and wives in love, enjoying, and sharing love and life with each other. They showed respect to and for each other, received respect from others, and were happily enjoying their life as a family-husband and wife living, loving, and happily enjoying life with each other in peace and harmony.
Are you newly married or have been married for quite some time and you have come to a crossroad of confusion, not knowing what to do to save or fix it? These critical times in a relationship are crucial and you must have the right mind to know the signals of a possible and failing marriage.Are you aware of the current signs that you and your partner are expressing to each other? Communication and compromise are key to surviving and maintaining a healthy and prosperous marriage. Let’s face it, you do not want to be hopping from relationship to relationship all your life to find out that in the end you will possibly be miserable and alone because you had to much pride and were not willing to compromise with your partner.Ever ask yourself if you know how to fix a marriage effectively? Let me tell you that if you can live a prosperous and a healthy life with your partner that you can surely lice longer. Single people do not live as long as people that are with someone. Knowing that you have someone that can share the burden of life with you can be a tremendous asset in any case.Also, having children with your partner that you can raise can be quite fruitful in the end when you are old. Having family around you can be quite important in your elderly years. That is why if you have a current issue in your relationship it would be better to fix it now before it is too late.
When you have children and are having marital problems, you should try to work things out. A divorce hurts everyone – the couple getting divorced, the family and friends of the couple, and the children. However – if your problems are abuse related, please get out. The children are suffering more by your staying there. You should NEVER stay in an abusive relationship. Leave – if your spouse really loves you, they will work on their problem, and you can go back, if you choose. No relationship in the world is worth harm to you!Children are especially hurt by a troubled marriage, because they are faced with the fact that the only home they’ve ever known may be torn apart. You have to make it very clear to them that this isn’t their fault, and explain, as much as you can, what is going on with the marriage.Among other things, a divorce means a custody case. The children may be faced with choosing one parent over the other. A child that is forced into that situation often struggles with emotional difficulties for a long time afterward. In younger children, the court offers no choice. The court makes the decision of who gets custody.Many children of divorced parents suffer from anger problems, insecurity issues, and loneliness. They can suffer sleep problems, or eating problems. These problems are merely a reaction to the trauma they have endured.When you are facing a divorce, you really should try to save your marriage, especially when you have children. Don’t, however, use your children as a crutch – sometimes a divorce simply cannot be avoided. In that situation, ensure your children that they are loved very much by both of you, and instill in them that this is in no way their fault.Once you have both decided that you want to try to save your marriage, you have to start working on it immediately. Find out what the problems are, and start to fix them. It will take some time, but both you and your children will be much stronger, and your family bond will be much stronger, also.
Marriage Records – I Now Pronounce You Mrs. Right! A perfect way to verify someone’s identity. Did you recently get married? Congratulations! Now that you are back from the honeymoon, chances are you have some identity housekeeping to do. You need to update your social security number, update your driver’s license, update your credit cards, get yourself added to your spouse’s insurance and more.If you want your new name listed on your important documents though, you are going to need something more than your shiny new wedding band and newlywed glow to prove to everyone that you are now a Mrs. Changing any of these things will require you providing copies of your marriage records.Marriage records contain personal information that identifies you and establishes that on such and such a date you legally married your spouse, thereby becoming “Mrs. Right”. Employers, insurers, creditors and government offices use this as a means to verify that you are who you say you have now become, before updating anything. Your marriage license will list your maiden name, your date of birth and your social security number as well as other information which varies by state. Using this documentation, in conjunction with your current identification is the only way that you can legally update your records to reflect your married name.There are many ways to obtain marriage records today. As a matter of public record, anyone can look up your marriage license. In the past, doing so would require going to the state and often even the county in which you were married and doing a public records search. Of course, if you weren’t sure what state or county someone was married in, they could well be divorced by the time that you found the information you were looking for. Today it is easier than ever, thanks to the internet. With powerful search engines that are tied into the public records databases of every state, a public records search can be completed in mere seconds.Whether you are looking for your own marriage records or those of someone else, it has never been easier to find the information that you are looking for. For a small subscription cost you can easily find out whatever happened to the king and queen of your prom. Did they ever actually get married? You can find your 5th grade best friend, even though her last name is different now too. With a quick and easy records search, everyone is at your fingertips.