There is no way you can have a happy and lasting marriage if there is no trust. Every relationship requires trust, and a marriage is no exception. You have to know that your spouse will be faithful, or else you will be worried every time they aren’t in your presence. Worrying what your partner is doing when you’re not with them will affect your work life and social life negatively.This is a very unhealthy way to live, but what can you do to fix your marriage after all trust is gone? Trust is not automatic, it’s something you earn. So when your spouse abuses your trust, you feel violated and angry.No matter how hard it might be, if you still love your spouse you have to learn how to trust them again. That is the only way your marriage can continue productively. Here are 4 tips to help you fix marriage after trust is gone.1. ForgiveThere is no way you can make a fresh start in your marriage if you do not forgive your spouse. Depending on how hurtful the situation is, it might take you a while to fully let go of the past and forgive them. Don’t worry, give yourself some time and you will get there.2. TalkDon’t expect one sit down meeting to cover everything. This is not a quick fix so it won’t happen overnight. Fixing your trust issues with talking may take some weeks, or months.3. Spend Time With Each OtherTo fix the trust issues in your marriage the both of you have to commit to spending more time with each other. Less time apart will hurt the trust in your marriage further.4. Don’t Be Suspicious All The TimeSuspicion will show your spouse you doubt and distrust them. When you continually accuse your spouse, there will be times when you accusations are wrong. There is nothing worse than accusing your spouse for something they haven’t done. This kind of suspicion will make your partner start to wonder if you feel guilty for your own actions.Overcoming trust issues in your marriage will take time, and cooperation from you and your spouse. It’s never too late to fix your marriage, so don’t let so don’t let nothing stand in your way.
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Even with the stress of the current recession couples can find ways to make their relationship stronger. Here are some clear do’s and don’ts that you can start practicing today.1. Tell your spouse that they are appreciated. It takes five positive acts of appreciation, love and respect to counter every one negative occurrence. It is probably easy to remember the last time you stated a criticism, but when was the last time you gave your spouse five compliments in one day?2. When you are engaged in disagreement, make attempts to turn the fight around. Use humor, empathy, interest, and affection to say something appreciative, to make an attempt to repair the interaction.3.Stop reacting to old patterns and triggers form the past. Increase your awareness of what makes you react and learn new ways of thinking. Learn how to respond with choices rather then getting flooded with feelings and acting impulsively. Focus on what you like about what your spouse does and says rather then what is missing.4. Be interested in what makes your spouse tick.Learning about your spouse will help you to see their realty is not yours. You may understand, even if you can not agree.5. Be open to accepting influence from your spouse. Learn about compromise. Consider what is good for the relationship rather then listening only to your own thoughts and feelings.These behaviors will be a good start to saving your marriage. If you find any of the above to be hard to put into action you may find marriage counseling to be helpful. Ask your Dr. and friends for a referral, or check on line for various directories for therapists (Psychology today has one for example).
When you’re young and in love you see romance everywhere. Over time life becomes more complicated. Romance slips away unnoticed. Crowded out by all of the other things in our busy modern life. Now it’s time to romance back. It’s time to put a little spice back into your marriage.When your world seems to have been taken over by responsibilities like taking care of the kids or paying the bills, it’s easy to forget the importance of romance. It’s easy to slip into a comfortable routine. Get up, go to work, come home, make dinner, clean up, watch a little TV, go to bed, then get up and do it again.Many of us have become so used to this routine that being romantic makes us feel a little awkward. There was a time when doing romantic things for your spouse was completely automatic. The good news is that you will feel comfortable again. Acknowledge the fact that you will feel awkward for a little while and jump back in with both feet.The first step is to develop a deep appreciation for your partner. Focus on their positive features. We all have positive and negative features. Over time we tend to focus on the negatives. This is your change to turn back the clock. Write down every good thing about your partner. When you’re done, read through the list and focus on how lucky you are to have them in your life.Think back to a time when you were romantic. Certainly you were romantic as newlyweds. Hopefully that wasn’t the last time you were romantic! Now just do those same kinds of things again. Take the time to learn about your partner all over again. You may feel that now you already know your partner very well, that there is nothing new to learn. But then why are you reading this article. If you already know them so well, then “Why aren’t they happy?” and “Why aren’t you?”As we get older and take on adult responsibilities, we forget how to be kids. So be a kid again. Grab you partner and do the things that you loved as a kid like riding a swing or playing hide-n-seek. It’s great to be a grown-up but every once in a while it’s fun to let your inner child out.Here are a few more ideas to get your creative juices flowing. Give your spouse a massage. Candles and scented oil will make the massage even more memorable. Make them their favorite breakfast. Leave them a secret note someplace they’re sure to find it. Use your imagination to come up with more ideas. Check around online. Just enter “romantic ideas” into your favorite search engine. The last time I entered that on Google, I got back over 800,000 results.Being romantic is an attitude. Sacrifice the time you are now wasting on petty worries. Instead spend that time thinking about something you can do to bring a little spice back into your marriage. The time you spend is a great investment, an investment in the most important relationship in your life.
Countless thousands of new couples end up screaming in just a short time of marriage – stop this divorce! What they need to do is seek out some advice, and one way to do that is to buy a marriage counseling book.They’re loaded with professional advice from experts on the subject. These authors have dealt with multiple thousands of cases and are armed with tips and advice that can save your marriage.Many married couples are turning their lives around with the use of good marital advice. Pre-marital counseling has also proven to be a huge foundational tool for making a marriage work. This counseling makes the couple aware of things that could happen, before they do, give them a ‘heads up’ on how to deal with these mostly unforeseen problems.When you buy a marriage counseling book, you may be buying the exact thing that will stop this divorce in its tracks. By acting quickly, you don’t allow things to fester, and grow bigger walls for you to climb over.Never let yourself get so full of pride that you can’t accept help. Stubborn and unforgiving people rarely survive marital problems. You have to stay open, and put your marriage and your spouse first. No other way will do.In order to stop this divorce, the price of a marriage counseling book is a cheap way to learn to cope. Take advantage of the times, get that book, read it, digest it, and then apply it. You’ll be glad you did.
It’s so sad to see so many divorces these days. Did you know that most divorces happen only because the couple does’t know how to resolve their problems? Most marriages CAN be saved! When your marriage is on the brink of divorce, there IS hope. You can turn your marriage around, and it is easier than you think!Your marriage is tense right now, and both of you are full of negative emotions and behaviors. You are probably both picking on every little thing that the other one does. This is totally normal. By keeping this negativity in your relationship, you are letting it bring your marriage down more. When you take steps to bring positive emotions and actions into your marriage, you will see it start to get better. It’s not hard at all to do, either.Let’s say the two of you are eating dinner. Start a conversation with something simple, such as how your spouse’s day went. If your spouse made dinner, tell them that it is good, and thank them. This little thing brings positive thoughts in, and as you do this you will find yourself doing it more and more. Also, people are drawn to positive people. As you start to be positive, your spouse will, too. You will start to feel the ease of tension in your marriage, and can easily go from there.This may sound silly to you, it did to me when I was having my own marital problems. But I tried it, just because I couldn’t think of anything else to do. It seems ridiculous, but I saw improvements that same day. Just as one bad remark leads to another, thus causing an all out war, one POSITIVE remark, no matter how small, leads to another positive remark, and bad feelings start to fade.
Without a doubt, divorce brings on changes in your life and in the lives of the people around you. Family members and friends tend to take sides in a divorce. Which means some people might consider you wrong or might not even agree with the reasons for the divorce.Some studies have shown that when people divorce they spend less time with the people they were once close with when married. With that said, a dramatic lifestyle change is one reason to save your marriage and stop a divorce but these 3 reasons are much bigger reasons why you shouldn’t give up on your marriage.1. Your Divorce Will Hurt Your ChildrenIf you have kids, then saving your marriage should be something to seriously consider. Kids of divorced parents have a difficult time through the whole process. Don’t be alarmed if your kids school grades begin to drop, your kids become depressed, or if your kids have trouble making and keeping friends.It’s been proven, even if a child is part of an unhappy home he or she will still benefit more than a child whose parents are no longer together. A child will be much happier with both their parents together even if their household isn’t perfect.2. Divorce Costs A lot Of MoneyNot all divorces will cost you an arm and a leg, but at the minimum a divorce will cost you several hundred dollars. It’s no secret it costs a lot less to save a marriage than it will to end one.3. Divorce HurtsEveryone may not know this until they go through a divorce, but a divorce hurts. No one can describe how much a divorce hurts because it hurts some people deeper than others. While going through a divorce you will go through a variety of different emotions you never imagined. Without a question, divorce stinks.