Unless one of the partners in the marriage is a flippant and frivolous kind of person, it takes a lot of motivation and desperation to call off a marriage, no matter what the duration is or the effects this decision will have on the spouse or the rest of the family. However, if there is intrinsic love and respect for each other, you could still save your marriage and salvage the situation before it gets too late.Though it is critically important to know why the split up happened in the first place, we are not going to talk about it right now presuming that you already have a clear idea what or who is responsible for breaking up your marriage. Let us think more positive and discuss ways to save your marriage, where the most important point to remember is that the intention to save it has to be present in both of you. It is impossible to save your marriage where only you express keenness to repair the damages and the other simply sits back and assesses your progress. In case you see this happening, it is better that you stop further efforts to save your marriage, instead release the person from the bondage.Let us begin where it normally begins when a marriage turns sour: total breakage in communication; disinterest in all activities where you play a role; staying away from any intimacy including sex; shying away from any social interaction; resorting to various types of addiction; staying away from home as much as possible; frequent outbursts of temper – in fact ask any person going through a bad marriage and he or she would come up with more gory incidents. Be that as it may, you somehow sense that the days are numbered when your spouse is either going to leave home or announce the intention for splitting. Ideally, as an intelligent and aware spouse, you should start work to save your marriage at the earliest signal before the snowballing effect starts to show. But even if you blame events on other causes like stress at work, loss of job, death in the family, ill health, a ominous combination of all or whatever, make it a point to keep a close watch on the way things are moving if you want to save your marriage. Here are some tips which have always proved right, no matter what the individual situations are:- Before you start your efforts to save your marriage think and write down the issues which are bothering you. Do not rely on memory and never start any discussion on the subject when one or both of you are in a bad mood. Pick up an opportune moment, preferably when there is no one at home, or somewhere where you can talk without any interruption when you can gradually broach the topic.- Sound positive and express your sincerity of purpose right at the beginning. Make it very clear that you are very keen to save your marriage and this discussion is not to blame each other or pin-point each other’s inadequacies. Try to make this meeting constructive rather than wasting time on trivia.- To save your marriage, discuss issues openly and frankly, without using abusive or hurtful words. Even if your spouse has made umpteen mistakes including acts of insensitivity, carelessness, irresponsible behavior, etc – you do not have to bring up those topics rudely. For example, if excessive alcohol consumption is an issue between the two of you, talk about health concerns more than anything else. If there is a third person who is disrupting the marriage, never abuse or underestimate the other person – in stead, make polite enquiries and ask your spouse abut his or her future intentions, depending on which you could chalk out your future course of actions to save your marriage.- Spend as much time as possible with each other. Invite your spouse to that quaint little restaurant where you have spent many happy hours earlier. The whole idea is to talk and open up your hearts in a peaceful and relaxed environment. This also includes planning a short holiday, where you could be together for a long stretch of time. The touch therapy still works. Touch your spouse whenever wherever just to show that you are there and you care.Forgiveness, patience and perseverance are perhaps the most important tools you need to save your marriage. The critical issue here is not to waste time in wishful thinking or even allowing hatred and anger to build up. It spoils the chances to save your marriage even further.
Tag Archive for ralph lauren sweaters for women
After a few years of marriage, a lot of people find they don’t have anything to talk about but who left their toenails under the couch, and what happened on Grey’s Anatomy. If you’re in a long-term relationship that’s lost it’s sizzle, now’s the time to figure out how to get that sizzle back.The key to revving up romance is to bring one new element to date night:Change the Place.Go to tango class rather than spending another Saturday night at Outback, or get freaky in the guest room (or even the back yard), instead of the usual romp in your own bed.Change the Subject.Instead of talking about the kids, what’s for dinner, or what happened on the Spam account, ask questions like you did when you were dating: What was your college essay about? What’s the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to you as a kid? Where’s the weirdest place you’ve ever gotten lucky?Change what you Wear.Forget jeans and dump the track suit. Get all dressed up for a big night out, even if you just hit the local Denny’s. The act of spending time on your appearance in anticipation of your date will make you feel more romantic before you even get your pantyhose on.Change your Color.Wear red, and lots of hit. Dye your hair or slink out in something scarlet. Wearing red increases your heart rate (and his) and mimics attraction – just enough to kick-start a slow night.Change your Scent.A study at the University of Chicago showed men associate the scents of cinnamon and vanilla with love. When you’re looking to cook up a little romance, pop some of those ready-to-bake cinnamon rolls in the oven, or wear a cinnamon-vanilla scented perfume. (We love the Man-Magnet Parfum Glacé) Trust me ladies, it works like catnip for men.(C) Copyright 2002-2009 by Lisa Daily. All Rights Reserved.
Marriages are made in heaven. This is true in good old days. But now we have to be careful before making any decision about our marriage. If you have met someone who you think will be perfect for you, and wanted to know more about him go ahead and check marriage records. There are lots of internet sites out there to check the records which will tell you promptly whether he is already married or not.Even if you are already in a relationship, but having some doubts in his behavior, you can also check on him to clarify your misunderstanding. Having something running on your mind, you can’t have a peaceful mind and have a happy life. Rather than wandering between the thoughts here and there, you can go ahead and check marriage records, so that you can move ahead in your life depending on the result.You can also go to some government offices to check marriage records. But they may require you to fill up a form about your husband. If you don’t know the answer then they can’t help you with his marriage records. You have to prove them, who you are and why you need the information in the first place. This is some time difficult for you if you don’t know the person very well. But the websites might help you more with the minimum information you got.Some websites require you to pay some small amount to check marriage records, small as 20-50 dollars. If you pay the amount, and if you give them little information about your husband, then they might give you the marriage record of your husband without asking any questions about yourself. This will be good for the ones who are just starting the relationship or haven’t married yet, because they can’t give their information without knowing whether or not they will continue the relationship.If you don’t know him very well, or if you are just starting your relationship, but you wanted to do a check on him before continuing the contact, then you should certainly try those internet websites. Why we have to take risk if there is some other way to check marriage records which can be done for a low cost. So, try to save your time and money by checking his marriage records before continuing any relationship.
For a young couple just starting out together the thought of saving your marriage before it starts may be a difficult concept to grasp. Truly starting off on a firm foundation together is the key to finding happiness in your marriage.In our culture the hurdle to entry for marriage is set quite low. Most places require a simple document or license verifying the identities of both individuals. Rarely is there a guide, instruction or a simple road map to follow in order to create a lasting relationship.Saving your marriage before it starts is a decision to take your preparation to the next level. Early romantic love over time gives way to deeper more meaningful levels of love but the transitions aren’t always so smooth. The key to finding happiness in a marriage is learning the skills and creating the ability to communicate in order to persevere through the more difficult times together.Early on as two people come together so often they are caught up in the passionate nature of new love. During this time they feel as if their relationship is somehow different from everyone else’s. Their relationship is impenetrable to problems or conflict, the chosen partner is perfect for them and they could never be upset with them.Preparation is key to finding happiness in marriage. Understanding each others real needs and desires and more importantly how to respond to conflict are the earliest difficulties in most relationships.Misunderstandings in the early days may endure time and become the same conflicts that ultimately cause the demise of the marriage if not handled properly.Saving your marriage before it starts is the essence of preparation. Build a solid foundation with your partner first. It doesn’t require other people sitting down with you and lecturing on the potential pitfalls of marriage. It can however be accomplished intimately together with your partner in the comfort of your own home.
Marriage brings two individuals with different opinions and characteristics together. Despite these differences together they are unique and complete each other. The first thing a married couple must realize is that their life together won’t be a fairy tale, because their marriage will have problems.You have to build a strong marriage so when these problems do show up you can be better equipped to deal with them. To accomplish this you have to continue to work at building the bond in your relationship. Building a stronger bond is a process and won’t happen overnight.Still, when the bond in your marriage has become strong enough, it will be able to withstand anything. You will feel fulfilled to know that you built your relationship from the ground up and nothing stands a chance against your marriage, not even divorce.1. Keep Each Other As The Prime FocusBefore you got married your partner was your main focus, the two of you were very courteous towards each other and did a lot of the little things. When you get married it’s easy to forget the little things, or how to be courteous. You stop seeing each other as important as you once did. You might find yourself putting your kids, work, or even your hobby first. In order to build a strong bond, you have to take your partner seriously. Remember how lucky you are to be married to your partner and keep them as your prime focus.2. Welcome ChangeIf you expect the person you married 5 years ago to still be the same person you married 5 years later then you are in for a big surprise. The both of you will change as time goes on, this change is natural. To build a strong bond in your marriage you have to welcome this change that happens with time, not go against it.
When you’re looking for marriage problems advice, you know that your marriage is on rocky ground. You didn’t plan on having marital problems when you got walked down the aisle. But many couples face serious issues in their relationship after being together for several years. You need to find new ways to strengthen your marriage and avoid the heartache that comes with a failed relationship:Keep Your Relationship InterestingHave you noticed that your marriage has slowly slipped from being lively to one that’s revolving around daily chores and petty bickering? You find yourself in countless arguments with your spouse over seemingly insignificant things. You’ve stopped having much interest in what your spouse has to say about anything and possibly vice versa. What you’ve got to do is keep your relationship interesting! That’s one of the best marriage problems advice that you’ll hear from friends and counselors. You don’t always have to do everything together. Have different hobbies and spend time away from each other with your friends. Indulge in recreational pursuits independently of each other. You’ll find that when you get home, you have a lot to talk about. And you’ll bring that energy and enthusiasm into your home, spicing up tired routines and infusing liveliness into your daily activities as a couple.Keep A Lid On Your AngerStress is a major cause of marital breakdowns. The underlying issues could range from emotional neglect to lack of appreciation. One partner feels threatened or emotionally traumatic and vents their outrage in a torrent of verbal abuse. Your spouse will not easily forget your angry words. And when you’ve calmed down, you’ll probably regret the inconsiderate accusations you hurled in a fit of pique. Reliable marriage problems advice will counsel you to rein in your anger. Don’t react immediately to annoying situations with your spouse. Deal with petty irritations rationally, without investing too much emotional currency in the outcome. Speak calmly with your partner and explain the issue. You may find it easier to phrase your thoughts if you write down what you feel.Keep Your PromisesGenerally both parties to a marriage have contributed to its troubles. Marriage problems advice are necessary when one or both of you have not kept your side of the marriage bargain. When you’ve defaulted on promises made or indulged in destructive behaviors, your marriage will eventually suffer from the strain. Learn to say sorry for things that you’ve done which have broken the relationship. Apologize for bad behavior and show your partner you’ve changed your attitude with concrete actions. Be sure to hold firm to your promises and confirm that your assurances are not written in sand. You won’t need marriage problems advice for much longer when you abide by this simple rule.
Failed marriages have been estimated at over 70% worldwide. Not a very encouraging statistic is it? But people are seemingly unperturbed and are marching down the aisle regardless!So why are couples so readily prepared to become yet another failed marriages statistic?The dynamic between couples can be divided into several categories, the more predominant of which are listed here:-No. 1) HEAD IN THE SAND.Amazingly some couples do not even think about the possibility of their marriage ending in divorce and quite understandably are completely shocked when they find themselves in the failed marriages ‘hall of fame’. These are the people who think a marriage should just ‘happen’ and that they needn’t have to do any work at all! It’s the typical “if I don’t acknowledge it, it won’t happen” type of thinking that doesn’t get anybody anywhere they really want to be. THERE IS A SOLUTION:Take your head out of the sand and get up to speed. How? Well, start by asking each other and yourself some really big ‘quality’ questions and really get to know each other. Be prepared to be shocked and amazed but also encouraged and surprised!No. 2) GO WITH THE FLOW.Other couples are scared to challenge one another in case it upsets their relationship, so they agree with each other if at all possible or say nothing! Now in the short term this appears to work as each one thinks they are compatible with the other. In the long run they are definitely heading for the failed marriages heap, people can only keep quiet for so long, ‘the truth will out’, causing all sorts of very unpleasant interactions. THERE IS A SOLUTION HERE TOO:Don’t be a yes man/woman. Honour your own and your partners views (when you find out what they are!). You really can have different views and still be compatible and stay married! Of course if most of your views differ you will have problems and need to ask yourselves why you got together in the first place!No. 3) JUST BE YOURSELF.Many relationships are inhabited by two very straightforward no-holds-barred types. They believe that if they just let it all out, tell it as it is, their partners will get to know who they really are much quicker and they will find it easier to accept them – warts and all. WRONG! These are definitely failed marriages – even if the couple stay together they generally have failed. They tend to fight regularly and verbally abuse one another and look for opportunities to exact their revenge. This is not a relationship but more of a war zone! THIS CAN BE AVOIDED:Think before speaking, endeavor to communicate with love. Be tender with your partner, remember it is not a match, a competition or a battle! If even one of you changes your method of communication, it will completely alter the dynamic between you both and usually the other person follows suit – but not always. Remember – the names you call your partner is what they eventually become for you. So consider carefully before you speak who it is exactly you want to be married to and avoid being another failed marriages statistic.No. 4) DO AS YOU ARE TOLD.Some marriages have an unbalanced set-up where one person is the boss and the other is basically an ‘employee’. Now the boss is usually the happiest as he/she gets their own way all the time. The employee fulfills the boss’ desires and often the only reward is the feeling that they are doing a good job, which gives them some form of happiness. But obviously (to people with more self-respect), this is not a loving marriage and is destined to join the long list of failed marriages. THIS IS AVOIDABLE TOO:At all cost avoid thinking that you are in love with a tyrant. If you want to be controlled then you have ‘lost’ part of yourself and you need to get that back before you embark on the journey of a marriage. A marriage is a union of equal parties – if you were equal to your partner in this particular scenario, you would be getting your way around 50% of the time. Start using the work ‘no’ and if you find you are reticent to do so or fear your partners reaction, I would suggest you get some outside help.
Humans are never content in what they have and how they got it. That is what keeps us trying to make things better for the most part. Marriage is no exception as it has changed shapes and forms from the early heydays to where it stands now.We are the only species who have institutionalized marriage from not having it at all in the beginning, to a mere exchange of vows and a handshake purely for financial gains in old times, fast forward now to more of an emotional and psychological commitment between two individuals.It is considered a norm to be married with kids, dedicate your life in upbringing the next generation, and in the process sacrifice all that you have to with no expectation of return on it. Problem is, for some it comes naturally and for others it cannot be abnormal enough.In sub-continent (India, Pakistan, Bangladesh etc), marriage is considered to be a responsibility for parents and in haste of being done with the job at hand they often make unfortunate decisions. In rather stark contrast it ought to be an informed outcome of consent from both individuals and families, and should be celebrated for it to not become a cause of regret later.Just in case if you were wondering and needed my opinion on:- If is it a must to get married? NO, it’s not. But YES it helps to have someone to share your life with.- If one should get married just for procreation? NO, just get a pet or adopt a child in need instead. Not to mention you will be doing injustice to your partner if you got married for the wrong reasons.- If is it nice to be married? YES, it could potentially be if you know what you are getting into and have expected to make changes to accommodate the new lifestyle.- If waiting for the right person is a good idea? YES, it beats getting your marriage turn out to be a bad one.- And last but not least, if it’s OK to get married for money? I am not sure about that as the jury is still out on that one . Just kidding and NO you should not if there was any doubt.We are social animals and companionship is our basic need, so surround yourself with worthy people as they help you unlock your potential and if in the process you like someone (or more than one in some countries) enough to get married, then you can enjoy the fruits of it even more.
What makes saving your marriage impossible? First, let me ask the question. What kind of a situation are you in? As you are reading this article, I guess that you are worried that your marriage is ending. Maybe your spouse has talked to you about divorce, maybe divorce proceedings are already taking place, or maybe your spouse didn’t talk to you about divorce but you are feeling it in the air.Friend – do not be desperate. Each and every marriage can be saved. Saving no marriage is impossible. What do you think had made your spouse marry you in the first place? He or she was feeling strongly to you once. It is not impossible to make him or her feel those feelings again.I should know this. I saved a marriage that was, by all counts, ending. My husband not only didn’t care about me, but was rarely coming home. This happened after a string of very stormy quarrels we had. I too felt quarreling that much was becoming unbearable – but he was the first to react to it and stopped caring about me and coming home.Stop begging. The first thing to do to save a marriage is to straighten yourself and stop begging to your spouse. Begging only reminds him or her that you are just a “OK, I love you too” away and are as accessible as a person can get. Fundamental law of the universe: The less accessible you are – the more attractive you are.Seek outside advice. The most common mistake made by spouses who try to saving their marriages is to go by their own ideas. This is so wrong – you are at the center of the relationship and you can’t see anything, and you need the advice of someone who can look from way further up. Plus, an ending marriage makes one desperate and devastated (it surely made me that way) which makes the “ideas” you come up with utter nonsense.
Is your marriage on the rocks? If you want to save your marriage, this article will help you. When you are in a marriage crisis, you may feel that you are on your own. You may also feel that all hopes are lost. In order to save your marriage, you need to banish this thought now. Your situation is not hopeless. You still can get your spouse back.Every year, there are more than 2 million divorces. With so many married couples facing divorces, there are more professionals providing marriage counseling services. However, I have seen marriages got even worse because of counseling. One reason is because both parties will usually try to get the counselor to be on their side. This will not solve the problem at all. Apart from this, marriage counseling is expensive. You may not want to spend that much of money on it.Today, there are professionals who offer extensive home courses to help you save your marriage and their results and testimonials are very promising. These home courses are usually very affordable and have produced proven results to solve a broad range of marriage problems.The best thing about these home courses is that you do not need to get your partner to agree to go for counseling, which is a very difficult thing to do. These courses are designed in a way that you can work on it alone and save your marriage.By far, I have not come across a more effective guide on saving marriage than Magic of Making Up. Thousands of couples have saved their marriages and given their testimonials. Check it out from the link below: