You probably don’t need me to tell you that arguments are unhealthy. Clearing the air is fine, telling each other how you feel is fine. Arguing isn’t. If you feel the need to argue with your partner on a regular basis, it usually means frustration has built up to a point where you don’t feel you can communicate in a calm and rational manner.Do you find that during these arguments, you say things you don’t mean? Do you bring up irrelevant issues and events from the past? Do you find that after the argument you have to keep away from your partner for a while, maybe days at a time? If the answer is ‘yes’ to these questions then your marriage is not in a good place and it’s up to you both to take action to fix it. That is, if you want to fix it. As you are here reading this article, there’s a good chance you do, and even if you don’t – you probably want to move forward from this negative place you’re currently in. Whether that is individually, or as a couple is something you are going to have to find out. How you do that is completely up to you. Perhaps now is the time to reflect on the marriage as a whole and analyze the exact areas that are contributing to it currently being unhappy.It’s up to you to decide whether you want to continue living in an unhappy marriage or if you are going to take action and move forward.
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Your marriage is hurting, and you want to learn what you can do to resolve the problems. There are many different reasons for marital problems, and there are many different ways to fix those problems.The very first step in repairing your marriage is to learn to recognize the problem(s). It could be financial, emotional, etc. You have to figure out what the problem or problems are before you can try to fix anything.Talk to your spouse. Find out their side of the story. Ask them how they think it should be fixed. Tell them your side, and how you think things could be better. By asking their side, you are really doing two things -#1: You are telling your spouse that you value their opinions. You are telling them that you do love them, and that you want to make your marriage work.#2: You are letting yourself see another point of view. Sometimes, when we see things at a different angle, we are better able to come up with more solutions to the problems.Working together is the best way to solve your problems. That’s what marriage is about – two people brought together to live as one. By learning to work as a team, you will find that even the most difficult problems can be handled with no thoughts of divorce at all.Also, by learning to work together, you will develop a bond between the two of you that will become so strong that you will be able to handle anything. Together.
Your marriage is falling apart, and you are completely lost. Marital problems are quite stressful, and are difficult to handle. When you feel as if you are losing the love of your life, you will do anything to keep them, if you only knew how. Here are five tips that will help you to start to save your marriage from divorce.#1: What are the Problems?First you must figure out exactly what the problems are. You simply cannot fix anything if you don’t know what to fix! Once you understand what the problem is, you will be able to learn how to deal with the situation correctly.#2: Control Your EmotionsWhen a marriage is in crisis, the last thing you want to do is add to it by behaving irrational. Desperation and panic cause us to do things we normally would not do. When trying to save your marriage, you HAVE to remain calm. This is the only way you will be able to think clearly enough to get the situation under control.#3: CommunicateYou both have to learn to communicate with each other, and do it effectively. You must not only listen to each other, but you must also understand what the other person is saying. When you talk to each other about your problems, it eliminates any misunderstandings that may hinder your chances of saving your marriage.#4: Seek advice from family and friendsDepending on how bad your problems are at the moment, you may want to consider asking advice from an outside source. Start by asking family and friends. Since they are close to the situation, they may see things differently than you do. They may give you some suggestions for what they see is happening to your marriage, and they can offer advice on how they think you could fix it. You have to be careful, though, when taking advice for fixing your relationship from family and friends. While their heart is in the right place, they may unintentionally offer the wrong advice, thus causing more marital conflict.#5: Seek Professional HelpIf you still can’t find a solution to your marital problems, you may want to look into seeking professional help. This help is available in many forms, from marriage counsellors to ebooks, available online, written by professionals to help couples save their marriage.
If you are in a marriage relationship, you may take it for granted that your ‘husband still love me’. However, a number of things make people change over time and the issue of your husband’s love may not be as simple as it may appear at first. Nevertheless, given that women often have very sensitive instincts, you may sense that your husband no longer feels the same way towards you as he used to.Your instinct may give you a red light so that you know that things are not in order. However, you may need more concrete proof, and that’s why it’s necessary for you to know the important signs. These are the things that will help you to know whether your husband still loves you.The frequency of his verbal expressionsDuring the earlier stages of your marriage, your husband most likely used to tell you how much he loved you fairly frequently. He did not need to have any special reason to give his verbal affirmation. With time, he may say this less and less frequently.This is an important sign that your husband is falling out of love, which you should not take for granted. Do not assume that your husband does not tell you about his love since he knows that you are already aware of it. There must be some kind of reason why your husband has stopped telling you that he loves you as often as before. The reason could be that he does not really love you as much as before.Consider his actionsWhile your husband’s words are important in determining whether he still loves you, his actions are even more significant. Try to recall how he used to behave towards you when you were still hotly in love.While it is natural for people’s actions to shift over time, there are some changes that will show you that your husband does not love you any more, at least not as much as previously. Although he is bound to change due to added responsibilities, he should not be making your life more difficult. If this is the case, it may show that he has begun to neglect you to some extent, which is a bad sign. If your husband’s behavior clearly indicates that he no longer gives you respect, the most likely reason is that he has fallen out of love with you.Once you have determined does ‘husband still love me’, you should not give up no matter how painful the reality may be. You can still reverse the situation and get your husband back in love once more.
When it comes to ways on how to save a marriage, some people think that if a marriage is ending and a spouse has made up his or her mind to divorce, there is nothing that the other spouse can do about it. i.e: It’s not possible to “do” something that will save your marriage. Well, today I am standing here as a counter-example: My marriage was failing, my husband wanted a divorce, and everything seemed hopeless UNTIL I started doing the right things. And I stopped the divorce from happening.Before I build up your hopes of a magic solution that will quickly fix everything, I must confess that there is no such solution. However, if you follow the right path with enough determination; you can fix any marriage, you can stop any divorce and you can make your spouse love you more than ever; whatever the situation is. So please bear with me as I tell you how I repaired our relationship.First, when my husband said he wanted a divorce; I reacted the same way all spouses do when they learn it: I panicked. I begged him for forgiveness and pleaded for our marriage. This is what everyone thinks of doing (and probably does) and it is because out of the desperation in your mind, the emotions overwhelming you. You should avoid doing this at any cost. Yes, I did that too but all it did was to push my husband further away from me.If you want to learn how to save a marriage then you have to calm down first. You CAN repair your marriage but first it requires careful consideration of the situation and acting accordingly; not knee-jerk reactions and begging out of desperation will help you save your marriage. The first thing I did correctly was to relax and it is a step in the right direction to stop your divorce.
Did you ever have a time that you tell yourself you want to break free from this marriage and be single again? A person can be sick of a marriage after together for a long time. This is especially true when couples are having the same routine every day. The most common reason when a person sick of marriage is “Bored”. When a person gets really bored in a relationship, they start to show out their bad attitude to the marriage.They begin to take things for granted. The mentality is like “since I am married for so long, why should I bother so much about how my husband or wife thinks or feels.” They start to ignore or pay lesser attention to their spouse, thinking that their spouse would “understand”.They also will start to feel their spouse is not as attractive as it used to be. There are many reasons contributing to this problem. Probably, the spouse also doesn’t bother to look good over years or may have overlooked to watch their waistline grow. At least 80% of the couples did not bother to dress up after marriage.Couples who are sick of marriage often find their partner not romantic enough. You may have heard people complaining stuffs like this, “My husband has changed so much after marriage, he stopped doing romantic things with me.” What does that means? It means couples still yearn for romance even it is 10 or 20 years of marriage. Romance will not go out of trend even it is centuries years later.The most sorry thing to hear is people do divorce because of boredom in the marriage and it is common. The fact is this is one of the easiest problems to fix in a marriage. If you or your spouse is wondering if you should divorce or continue the marriage, then let me tell you, most problems found in a relationship can be solved easily with the right methods used.
It is vital for spouses to learn about the recent techniques of saving their marriages because if they do not start to fix their problems as soon as they occur, they may never be able to fix them.Some traditional save marriage methods that are used more often than others are:Understanding How to Keep the Passion AliveTo keep the passion alive, spouses should keep doing what they used to do when they first met and started flirting like having dinner alone at a romantic restaurant or spending a weekend at a romantic beach motel.Maintaining CommunicationEffective communication between spouses is essential so both spouses should always try to communicate in an honest and sincere manner.Seeking Professional HelpThis can be very effective way of solving the problems in a marriage as long as both parties of the marriage willingly attend the sessions.Moving ForwardThis method of saving marriage may be really difficult for some people, however if they honestly wish for being together happily for years, they must forget about the bad experiences they had in their marriages.Although the traditional methods are useful in many cases, they generally do not work in the case of only one of the spouses is willing to fix to problems in the marriage. In those cases, the most effective method is using a well known modern save marriage method authored by a relationship expert.Save My Marriage Today eBook by Amy Waterman should be read by all married couples because it provides all the effective techniques to solve marriage problems. Indeed, Save My Marriage Today system provides all imaginable strategies to fix the problems spouses may encounter in their marriages. Any person can get effective results from the tips and tools included in the system regardless of their age, gender, the age of their relationship, and the type of problems they have in their marriages.Some key points of Save My Marriage Today are as follows:o Effective methods to save your marriageo Methods to increase passion in minuteso What to do after an affairo Personal assessment testo How to become a better communicatoro How to cooperate with your spouseo And much more….
Marriage should be one of the happiest times in your lives. Your married life most likely started out wonderful, but as time went on your marriage experienced some conflict. These conflicts will either make your marriage stronger, or damage it beyond repair.If you still love your spouse then a divorce should be the last thing on your mind. Yes you can stop a divorce and here are 4 ways you can do it.1. The first step to save your marriage from divorce is to agree these problems exist. These problems will never be solved if you try to ignore them. Accept your marriage situation for what it is and prepare yourself for the challenges you will face.2. The next step is to find out the reason behind these problems, you should start conversations with your spouse and give them the opportunity to open up to you. If is important to keep your ears as well as your mind open during your conversation. You are not going to like everything your partner tells you and that’s the point of this dialogue. Once you know your partner’s true feelings and they know how you feel, you can begin putting the pieces together and start rebuilding your marriage.3. The third step is to regain your love for each other. You can accomplish this by taking your partner out on special dates, and being more affectionate with them. Try to remember the romantic times you two once shared and begin recreating them. If you can successfully bring back the passion and love in your marriage, then most of of your problems will be solved.4. The final and most important step is to seek advice from family, and friends. You should also get expert advice from counseling sessions or books, because you can learn a lot from them
“Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough. -Lynnette, age 8.Even at the tender age of eight Lynette was onto something. I don’t have to mention this to the women reading: we men often practice selective deafness when our spouses and women friends talk to us. And we often run on and on about whatever interests us at the time–baseball scores, the stock market, stock car races, chain saws etc.–ignoring the feminine voice trying to tell us the dryer is on fire. The age old tale of Moses wandering around in the desert with the Israelites may have had some basis in actual fact; it could be that the old fellow may have been getting directions, just not hearing them very well. After all, the Sinai isn’t all that large a place.Why is it that people have a difficult time communicating, especially spouses, especially older spouses? Is it just because we have different interests? Are we built differently? Do men have smaller ears?Doesn’t matter, does it? It’s just true, and we have to learn to expect the difference, even if they’re just stylistic. Particularly as we grow older, hearing loss and styles of communicating become accentuated. Here, then, are a few tips on understanding the problem, and how to approach it in as courteous and loving way as possible to the benefit of your marriage. You might call it a sound investment in each other.Do you call your mate from another room in the house? This is such common practice you may not even realize it’s an irritation. Ask your mate, and their answer may surprise you. Particularly if your spouse is hard of hearing, they may tell you they hate it when you call to them from another room because they have to drop what they’re doing and go see what you want. They consider it disrespectful, and an interruption of whatever they’re doing. My wife and I work from home, in separate offices twenty feet apart, and we used to have this issue. Then we (actually I) understood she disliked the yelling back and forth, so we learned how to use our computers’ chat feature, and voila’, problem solved.The two of you may be operating with a different level of understanding, and the conversation may seem awkward, or strained. Thinking the conversation is over, mates have been known to simply walk away when this happens. As you might imagine, or if it’s happened to you, this is a mystifying outcome. Your spouse may believe you’re finished, or they may feel as if they’re being attacked in some way if they misunderstand. It’s been said that the real obstacle to understanding isn’t ignorance; it’s the illusion of knowledge. If we think we understand something but really don’t, all manner of mischief is possible. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, even if they seem inane or childish.Especially for older married couples, the possibility exists that the trouble communicating is related to some physical ailment, and should be investigated. Some people’s hearing does fluctuate over time. Those with Meniere’s disease often exhibit this characteristic, as do people with other hearing disorders. It’s important in these cases to understand that this natural fluctuation in hearing is in addition to the other factors that can cause variations in your mate’s ability to hear you. Here again, my experience may be helpful. My former career in aviation involved long periods exposed to high levels of sound, from turbine engines, screaming rotor blades, and radio frequencies drilling into my headset day after day. As conscientious as I tried to be, wearing ear plugs, headset and helmet all the time, my hearing loss is still significant. One thing my mate and I have learned to do is be aware of the deficit, and make adjustments accordingly: We don’t converse when the dishwasher is running; we don’t call each other on our cell phones from a windy place; we turn down the TV or radio prior to asking questions etc.; and we’re careful to get the others’ attention before trying to talk in a crowded room. If my wife realizes she hasn’t made herself clear, she’ll actually touch my arm, and repeat what she said. As an addendum to this, I never pull the deaf card when I actually forget something she told me to do, because, well, I’m a guy, I forget things. She seems able to remember what I said on our honeymoon, and every day thereafter. Go figure.As for situations that elicit irritation and possible conflict when differentials on hearing occur, here are a few to be aware of: Going out with friends. Did they understand you? Talking on the phone.It can be a source of real frustration for both of you when a hearing loss or inability to interact well with other people restricts your social life. Every one of us needs to get out with friends and family once in a while, and if one of you is threatened by that situation because you don’t hear well, it’s much easier to just stay home. One solution to this is to identify locales such as restaurants and the like where you know the extraneous noise level is low. Another possibility is to meet at someone’s home, or your own, or, if they insist on going out, call ahead for a table or booth in the quietest part of the facility.If you don’t know for sure whether or not your mate heard you it can be irritating, confusing, even dangerous. If hearing loss is a reality, perhaps a signal of some kind is in order. A simple question, such as “Did you hear me okay?” may suffice. On the other side of this scenario, the one who doesn’t hear well, or who has a habit of inattention, needs to acquire the habit of asking for a repeat, if that’s what it takes. No one likes being ignored; no one dislikes being asked for clarification.I already mentioned our difficulty with cell phones in the wind. My spouse has learned that any attempt to phone me when it’s windy is a study in frustration. So she doesn’t. She goes out of her way to find a calm spot, or waits till she’s inside.So communicating well in a quality marriage is more than just hearing each other, but it’s that, too. At some point it comes down to basic courtesy and appreciating your spouse’s interest. As they say, there’s a reason we have two ears and one mouth. In marriage that’s one bit of wisdom that helps create a sound investment for both of you. One last item: sometimes what’s truly important is hearing what your mate doesn’t say.
The good news is the divorce rate has declined. As per The Enrichment Journal the actual number for people getting married for the first time stands at roughly forty one percent.That is a nine point drop from the fifty percent figure often cited. Still it is not too much of a reason to celebrate considering that second and third marriage divorce rates remain high; sixty percent and seventy three percent respectively.There is also much speculation that this recession is having a dampening affect on the divorce statistics. Couples who may have been thought about annulling their marriage are finding it difficult in a tough economy to divorce simply because of the economic straits they and many others find themselves in.Recession or not the question remains why do so many marriages fail? Obviously there is no definitive blanket answer that applies to every couple past and present but you can pretty much figure that a lot of couples said “I do” for the wrong reasons.1. Love at First SightYou meet someone for the first time and fall head over heels for them. Many couples have experienced this and gotten married not too long afterwards. Many of these same couples not too long afterwards found themselves in divorce court.It’s not that a happy marriage cannot come out of love at first sight; the problem is it is still no substitute for getting to know someone. And that can be a long drawn out process which does not appeal to our romantic nature.True going that route is no guarantee of a successful marriage. But love at first sight followed by a rush toward the altar increases the chances that you are going to discover a lot more surprises (many of them unpleasant) once the honeymoon is over.2. The SexYou first met that special someone and the sex was terrific maybe the best the two of you have ever experienced. Will it carry you through the marriage? No. And some couples fool themselves into believing it will.Sex is an important and fun part of a successful marriage but it cannot be the only thing or even take precedent over all the other necessary components of marriage. Sex is also a wonderful way to show love but it is not the total package of love. More than a few couples have confused the two.3. Falling In Love With LoveJust the whole thought of the wedding and the ideal of romance has your head spinning. It feels like you are going to be on cloud nine forever.Except that you won’t. Sure you want the romance to continue throughout the marriage but to make sure it does requires hard relentless and often times very unromantic work. This reality has caused many a marriage to go downhill; and quick.Yes the forty one percent divorce rates for first time marriages is a depressing number. Even among the fifty eight percent that stayed married you know there are a lot of unhappy relationships on that side of the ledger. Unfortunately life offers no promises of eternal love and bliss.It has a way of testing and often times breaking couples apart. That’s the way it goes. So the best thing you can do is to not give it the ammunition by getting married for the wrong reasons.