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Marriage – 4 Things That Women Should Accomplish Before Saying "I Do"

It all starts with taking the L.E.A.P (four steps to happiness).LifestyleEarningsAlone timePassionFact -By now we all know that 40-50% of marriages ends in divorce, but let’s explore that even further. I bet many of you were not even aware that a whopping 36 to 39% of that percentage belongs to women and men under the age of 25. The plot thickens.The Myths -In today’s world, women are more independent than ever; however, many of us are still haunted by the myths “happily-ever-after” and “love can conquer all”, which play a major part in the high divorce rates. Let’s face it, many women still long for the fairytale ending of some handsome Prince sweeping them off their feet…taking them away from all problems, completing them, and on and on. This only works in the movies. In real life, after the honeymoon stage, everyday life starts to pay a visit-and often.The Culprit -The truth of the matter is these are some of the real culprits that threaten your happy ending:
Finances
Sex
Communication
Family
Religion
Resentment
Many relationships are doomed to fail before they even begin because they are started under such false pretenses. There are no guarantees, but if you’re thinking of getting married at some point in your life and want to increase the odds of happiness, take that L.E.A.P. These four simple must do’s (as I like to call it), prepares you for whatever’s to, come by starting with the one in the mirror, you!L-is for Lifestyle First take inventory of the life you currently live and the kind you see yourself living in the future. You may lead a quiet, laid-back, walks-along-the-beach type of life or you may like the excitement of concerts, parties etc. You may be quite the traveler; can’t stay put for long periods of time. Are you a vegan, religious, or a neat freak? Do you live lavishly, accepting only the finer things that life has to offer? You get the idea. Compatibility is a major aspect of a relationship. Learn your lifestyle.E- is for EarningGet your finances in order. Money’s not everything, but let’s be real honest-when things go wrong in a relationship, there’s nothing happy about being broke and alone with no plans. Set your income goals and go for it -full speed. Make sure you have a checking and savings account. Some of you may have mutual funds, stocks and bonds, even a 401k. Are you in debt? Take a look at your credit reports. See where you stand on paper and take the proper steps to improve your score. Don’t wait until you get into a relationship to do these things, because love has a way of distracting us, especially women. Go in solid or close to it.A-is for Alone This one may seem obvious, but few of us truly get this. Spend some alone time with, that’s right, you. Fall in love with you first before loving someone else. Ask yourself, “Who am I”? Figure out what truly makes you happy. Do you have trust, commitment, or jealousy issues? Are you religious or are you spiritual? If you don’t deal with these issues now, they will surface once you’re married, promise.P-is for PassionLast, but probably the most important of the four. Follow your dreams. Never and I mean never give up on your dreams. Take every single step towards that dream. Focus on you before you focus on someone else. If you do it the other way around, 9 times out of ten, you’ll end up putting your life on hold. Find that career and do what it takes to achieve it and thrive.So enclosing my friends, remember-although nothings guaranteed and no rule is set in stone, one thing’s for sure-no one can give you happiness, you must supply yourself with a plethora of it…then there will be plenty to go around.

Help Save My Marriage – 3 Key Steps I Took in Saving My Marriage

The passing years are hard on relationships and particularly marriage.With most relationships you can always walk away and start again with someone else. But when you marry your best friend and have 4 children together and the onset of time and years of taking each other for granted take a heavy toll on your relationship…then it is not a question of starting again.Because of the commitment, the children that you both love and on many occasions property ownership are major ties that bind and complicating factors.So..Tip 1-Work at your relationshipDon’t fall into the trap of “well this is the way I am..take it or leave it”. You must recognise your harmful behaviors and work at amending them so that you both can recognise the person that you fell in love with all those years ago.Tip2-Make time togetherThis time should be just for you and your partner, without distractions. And you must commit to this and clear your schedule to accommodate it at least once a week where you will both discuss how life is, what happened during the day/week and how you are feeling.Tip 3-Make datesYes, dates like when you started going out together..and make it as realistic as possible with even a little time apart before your date to build the anticipation of meeting and even giving yourself a blast from the past of what it was like when you first met.These 3 tips helped me in saving my marriage..they can help you too.But your partner must be prepared to commit to changing the existing pattern of your relationship along with you.There are many other steps to help you save your marriage but the 3 tips outlined above will go a long way to putting the love and romance back into your relationship and even though it is years later now..you can still find what you had back then, even if it is tempered by the growth of both of you as individuals.

Help For Troubled Marriage – 3 Smart Tips For Helping a Troubled Marriage

If you’ve found yourself in a difficult situation when it comes to your marriage then you should find the following tips useful. They may ultimately keep you from going down the road of a tragic and painful divorce. Below I have outlined what I consider important points about how to get control of a stressed and in trouble marriage. The items include remaining quiet and talking about your challenges, how to keep things in perspective, and how to keep from turning disagreements into shouting matches.1. Remain Quiet and Talk Through Problems.Sometimes we tend to get overly emotional about important issues that effect us personally. If you are a dominate type, you might find yourself trying to overpower your partner by being louder or shouting at them to get your point across. Usually this is counter productive, talking though your issues at a normal conversational can yield greater results.2. Keeping Perspective About Events That are Happening.One of the hardest things to do when your situation seems to be spinning out of control is to keep complex problems in perspective. A lot of time it’s hard to focus on what needs to be done to resolve relationship problems because we all have so many other commitments like work,kids, and other functions that need our attention. It may be a good idea to take time to a get away for a weekend or longer if you can stand it, and try and work out some issues. That is not always practical or possible, but you at least need to be able to speak without being distracted by others. This will let you see things from a different perspective and give you better judgment.3. Try Lowering Your Voice So As To Not Start Arguing.So what is the secret to getting your point across. Well I will tell you that it doesn’t involve yelling at each other. Sooner or later you will have to lower your voice if you want the other person to at least give you a chance to make your point. There is no doubt that when it comes to communicating with each other about a particular problem you will get more accomplished by not yelling. This will help much more in the long run.

Discover How to Make Your Wife Fall in Love With You All Over Again!

You want to know how you can make your wife fall in love with you again.  It seems like you’re losing the love of your life, and you have no idea how to keep her.  Is she dodging your attempts to show her affection? Now is the time that you have to be careful with your actions.  You have to stay as calm as possible.  By getting emotional, you will only make matters worse, and drive her further away.Take some time and look at your marriage.  Look very closely.  Have things changed?  Can you see what may be wrong, from her point of view?  By taking a step back, and looking at your relationship from both sides, you will be more able to see what’s wrong. Talk with your wife about these issues.  Sometimes relationships (especially marriages) fall into what is called a comfort zone.  It happens unintentionally – it’s no one’s fault.  You both just get comfortable with each other.  If this is happening in your marriage, it’s time to put some extra attention into it.  Plan for a night out.  Take her on a picnic. Think about if you have told her that you would do something, only to never do it – you simply forgot about it.  This also happens to the best of us, but it is something that is devastating to a relationship.  This is seen, by her, as a broken promise.  But there is a very easy way to fix this!  If you tell her that you will do something, DO IT!  Even with the smallest of things, this will make a big difference!Your wife may feel unappreciated.  Again, this can happen when a marriage falls into a comfort zone.  Show her that you DO appreciate what she does!  Surprise her by taking the garbage out unasked, or by doing the dishes for her or with her, unasked.  When you do something without being asked, she will notice, and you will start to see things changing, for the better!Just take things a little at a time.  Your marriage won’t turn around overnight, but you WILL start to see improvements within a few days!

Save Your Marriage – How I Changed the Fate of My Ending Marriage and Got My Spouse Back to My Arms

Is your marriage heading for the ugly end – a divorce? And do you want to save your marriage? Then I feel for you – because I know from personal experience how bad it is to see your marriage circling down the drain. I know how bad it is to see your marriage, which you fought so hard to protect and maintain; crumble down to pieces.I was in a similar situation – as you want to save your marriage now; I wanted to save mine. But I didn’t know what to do, and I didn’t know where to turn to stop a divorce. I did everything I could think of – I tried to talk my husband out of it millions of times, when that didn’t work I begged, and when that didn’t work also, I cried. Nothing seemed to work – and everything was hopeless.But now let’s let all those go – and fast forward to today. I have saved my marriage – and by saying that I am making a big, big understatement: my marriage is better than ever right now. And now I look back, and see all the mistakes I have made. And I can confidently say now: Every Marriage Can Be Saved. It is in your hands to save your marriage.How do you do that?If you have begged your spouse for reconsideration, or if you are thinking to do that (I know it is tempting), quit it immediately. The right way to save a marriage is the exact opposite of that: You have to make yourself less accessible, less easy to get for your spouse. How, and why?Because people want what they CAN’T get. By begging your spouse, you are shouting: “I am easy to have!” and nobody wants such a spouse. You have to reverse this situation if you want to save your marriage!

9 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Healthy

Almost three-quarters of wives have considered leaving their husbands at some point, according to a Women’s Day and AOL Living Poll. CNN.com reports it’s a wonder anyone ends up walking into the sunset as “geriatric lovebirds.”Because each stage of life offers new challenges, CNN.com provides nine ways you can protect the health of your relationship no matter which stage you’re currently in. Here’s a brief summary of the tips:* Watch your waistline – Married couples have larger waistlines, which can cause chronic health conditions and diminish sexual attraction. Watch portion sizes.* Make a financial plan – Money is the number-one argument topic for couples. Even if you have different spending tendencies and priorities (many couples do), resolve your issues by making a plan and maintaining honesty about money.* Create family rules – The way you grew up may be different from your spouse’s background and different from how you want to raise your family. Discuss home responsibilities, family priorities, how you plan to raise your children and how you will run your home as early as possible.* Make sex a priority (but not a chore) – If you schedule sex, it may turn into yet another responsibility. Regular intimacy is necessary for a healthy marriage.* Be flexible – During life transitions, your roles may change or be adjusted. Your spouses’ value (or your own) doesn’t depend on his or her paycheck or job.* Remain active – Find an activity you can enjoy together, to remain healthy and enhance your sex life.* Confide in a friend – A close friend can provide empathy and advice, but share carefully.* Rediscover one another – After the nest is empty, marital satisfaction generally improves. Use the freedom to enjoy each other.* Be a conscious caregiver – As you and your spouse age, chances are good one of you will need to be caregiver at least for a time. Ask for help when you need it. Caring for yourself will enhance the care you provide.

Three Reasons Not to Get Married

It was just one book containing one word; konkatsu. When the tome was first published in 2007 nobody really thought much about it. To this day it has only sold one hundred and seventy thousand copies; a solid number to be sure but hardly in the same league of Harry Potter.Yet the book The Era of Marriage Hunting written by Masahiro Yamada and Touko Shirakawa has had a profound impact on Japanese culture. It’s not that the entire population of that Pacific Island country was sitting around starry eyed waiting for their true love to appear out of thin air but the expression konkatsu meaning literally marriage hunting seemed to light a fire under many Japanese singles.It’s is probably a given that many people around the globe would love to get it on this trend. Nothing wrong with that. Most of us long to find our soulmate and share our lives with them. It is not something fake conjured up by hopeless romantics but a real and definite human need.The key is to make sure that human need is not being governed by1. DesperationIt has been so long since you have been in a relationship or you have waited an interminable amount of time to be in a relationship. Waiting can grate on anyone particularly when you are not in complete control of the circumstances. Desperation can lead to some poor decision making and that includes who you wind up in a relationship with.2. FearNone of us is getting any younger. A few years back when you were young and free age was just a number. Now it is something you are acutely aware of. It’s not that you are afraid of growing older but the thought of spending that time by yourself does get your heart to racing; and not in a good way.3. PressureYou’ve been dating the same person on a regular basis for quite some time. You really like them but neither of you is in a hurry to make it official.Too bad your family does not feel the same way. It’s your life and your relationship but that has not stopped them from being on your back about getting married. You dread going to those family gatherings because you know what’s going to happen. Eventually whatever conversation is going on will turn towards you and your singlehood; or more specifically why is it still going on.And your friends? At times they are worse than your family. They may not be so blatant but the gist is unmistakable.You want to get married but you do not want to get konkatsu about it. Saying you want a marriage on your terms may upset a lot of people but that’s the way it should be. Giving in to desperation fear or outside pressure may make others happy but unfortunately will not do you much good.

Discover Easy Ways to Save Your Marriage Alone

Why does it seem like when you wanted to get married, you both were excited to be involved, and now that your marriage is having trouble, only one of you wants to save it?It happens all of the time.  And it’s just not women who take the first step in saving their marriage, either.  more often, men are the ones who first try to save their marriage.  Even if your spouse doesn’t seem to want to try at first, you should do it.  You will see, when you start taking steps to save your marriage, that your spouse will realize what a good thing the two of you have, and will start to work with you to fix things.Every marriage has its problems.  Some are worse than others, but they are ALL fixable.  When you are saving your marriage alone, take time to really look deep inside your marriage.  Is there one thing in particular that seems to cause a lot of arguments?  Start to look at different ways that you can fix these problems. Most times problems start out small, and can easily be remedied.  It is only when we choose to ignore the problems, hoping that they’ll go away, that they grow to become huge problems.How much time do you spend together, as a couple?  Life has a way of getting between even the most loving of couples, so be sure to set aside time for each other.  Something as simple as watching a movie together, or talking over dinner is enough to bring back some of the spark that has gone out of your marriage.Show your spouse how much you truly love them.  Sometimes we start to take each other for granted, very unintentionally, over time.  We think that our spouse will always be there for us, no matter what.  When we don’t show our love for our spouse, they may start to feel like we don’t love them anymore.Sometimes all it takes is one person to want to save the marriage at first, and the other follows.

Fix Unhappy Marriage and Improve Your Relationship by Asking Yourself 7 Questions

Every relationship from marriage to the relationship we have with our friends has it’s own set of rules. In order to fix an unhappy marriage and improve your relationship you have to understand the basics of these rules.The most common reason most marriages fail is because one or both partners have a weak understanding and patience for their relationship. Once you understand your relationship and have the patience to fix it, it will improve significantly. Only then will the both of you emerge from you problems with a more matured view.Answering these questions honestly will fix your marriage and improve your relationship.
Are my opinions getting criticized?
Are my feelings and emotions being ignored?
Do small disputes transform into huge fights?
Do either of us walk out on heated arguments?
Am I being truthful to my spouse?
Do we tell each other what we really think?
Do I want to stay in this marriage or leave?
When both you and your partner answer these questions honestly, it will make it a lot easier for you to pinpoint where the problems in your marriage are coming from. In most cases people tie the knot and leave their marriage on autopilot. They don’t bother with trying to build their relationship stronger. However, building a good is an important step to having a happy marriage.The married couples that understand this have a stronger compatibility, less stress, and more happiness. Asking yourself these questions may bring back some bad memories, but it’s the only way to fix your marriage and start building a fresh new relationship.

God’s Plan For Your Marriage

Your marriage should be like a garden that is well watered and ever productive. It should provide a cool atmosphere for you and your children. God expects your marriage to be a place of healing, comfort and restoration. Peace, joy and safety should be the hallmarks of your household. It should be a source of hope and inspiration even to the strangers.God’s desire is that your marriage should last for a life time. Separation and divorce is not in God’s agenda for your marriage relationship. He plans that your home becomes a fountain of life and love that overflows even to the destitute, homeless and the needy. It is supposed to be a classic example for the single and other struggling marriages. They should come to you for wisdom and counsel.God wants you to be strong as a couple so as to withstand all the pressures and waves that are always contrary to marriages. He expects your commitment to the preservation and prosperity of your relationship. God also desires that you allow Him to be a partner in your marriage. This is because He wants to be always with you whether in good times or bad times.It is in the plan of God that your marriage relationship be free from all struggles and contentions. He is committed to provide everything that is necessary to give your marriage the greatest happiness that can ever be. God intends to bless your marriage with abundance of wealth and health. His plan is to protect your relationship from all troubles, calamities and misfortunes. No amount of evil shall prevail against your marriage because you trust in the Lord.

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